How Authentic Storytelling Can Help You Become the Dad You Want to Be
Guest Post by Adam Ukman
Director, The Dads Initiative
On my third or fourth date with my wife, I announced with certainty that I wanted kids, and if she didn’t, we shouldn’t waste each other’s time. She looked at me like I was crazy. Not crazy for wanting kids. But we were just getting to know each other – didn’t even know each other’s middle names or favorite movies – and my abrupt declaration felt, well…like a bit much.
But I’d already spent years picturing it: catch in the backyard with my future kid, or dance recitals, or homework at the kitchen table. It was the life I wanted, and I had no interest in hiding it. It took nearly 11 more years until we became parents (yes, she stuck with me), and honestly, until our son was born, we didn’t know if it would happen.
Then he arrived, and here’s the truth: for the first six or seven months, while I loved him, I didn’t love parenting. I was exhausted, my hands were raw from bottle washing, and I questioned whether, somehow, I’d been wrong all along. I felt ashamed that the Dad I was always so sure I'd be was different than the one showing up. Like maybe despite my desire, I didn’t have it in me.
In short, my expectations and my reality clashed. It’s not that it’s a hidden secret that parenting a newborn is hard. But the headline is always, "I fell in love with my kid the second they were born." End of story. The rest of the story doesn’t get much airtime, especially for Dads. And I was completely unprepared.
For the record, my now 3-year-old is the coolest, smartest, funniest, most interesting person I’ve ever met. But it was hard to envision loving Dad life in those early months, and it threw me for a loop. I don’t know that my experience was unique.
I’ve thought a lot about why. Part of it, I think, comes down to storytelling.
The stories about fatherhood matter. Not just for Dads of newborns, but along the whole journey of parenting. Far too often, the prominent stories of fatherhood in popular media don’t resonate. They’re not a true picture of what this wild, fun, challenging, amazing ride entails.
We get the bumbling fool Dad (Homer Simpson), the action hero Dad (Bryan Mills in Taken), the emotionally-distant Dad (Red Forman from That 70s Show). Few of us see ourselves reflected in those representations of fatherhood.
Beyond TV and movies, where men spend time online – YouTube, Instagram, TikTok – the loudest voices are too often peddling grievance, anger, division, and culture wars, not speaking to the men and fathers we're actually trying to be.
I felt ashamed that the Dad I was always so sure I'd be was different than the one showing up.
We need better stories for and about Dads. Just as important: if we want those stories to travel, we need to reach the Dads who aren’t looking for Dad content at all.
Fatherhood may be our most important job, but it isn’t the whole of who we are. I’m still a football fan, an avid reader, and a music lover. Most fathers aren’t turning in their "Dad card" at the end of the night, but that doesn’t mean they’re going online searching "parenting advice." They’re searching for sports content, fishing videos, financial advice, style tips, or anything else they love.
So that’s where we need to meet them – with good content built around the things they already care about, that connects those interests back to fatherhood along the way.
That's the idea behind an organization I started recently called The Dads Initiative. We’re creating entertaining media that reflects a version of fatherhood men actually recognize, and that inspires us to be the best men and Dads we can be – for our families, our communities, and each other.
This month, we launched our second flagship show: Cart Talk. Hosted by Company of Dads founder and avid golfer Paul Sullivan, Cart Talk follows two Dads playing nine holes, having honest conversations about golf, life, and fatherhood.
It’s fun to watch, and not just if you love golf. (Though especially if you love golf.) The moments that surface are real and authentic reflections on how we show up for our families, and for each other. For example, Golf Digest Editorial Director Max Adler lives and breathes golf, but it’s supremely relatable to hear him talking about navigating life as a father of four, including a set of twins.
Likewise, author Tom Coyne spent years traveling the world to play and write about the most prestigious courses, but he talks about finally coming back home to buy a rundown golf course of his own. That new adventure allows him to connect with his family in a new way, as they go along the journey together.
This first season of Cart Talk will bring a range of guests with their own stories – about golf and their lives as family men – that help us all remember that no matter where we are, or what club we’re swinging, we’re all playing the game of fatherhood as best we can.
Across Cart Talk and everything else we make, our aim is to entertain Dads. We give them content they want about the stuff they love. And along the way, we tell relatable stories that remind us we’re in this together.
I’m not a perfect Dad. I don’t know that there is such a thing. But like millions of Dads out there, I’m doing my best and learning along the way. My hope is that the stories we tell at The Dads Initiative will reflect that reality and deliver something all Dads need: Connection, community, and a reminder that, as Dads, we have the incredible privilege to help build the world our kids deserve.
Submissions from 70 countries and counting!
Daddying Film Festival & Forum (D3F)
The Daddying Film Festival & Forum (D3F) 2027 Call for Entries keeps rolling through the fall on FilmFreeway! Students (3rd grade-undergrad), Dads, Granddads, Moms, Grandmoms, dad figures, Parenting Podcasters, Musicians, and indie filmmakers can submit films, videos, and podcast episodes through November 23, 2026!
Early-bird discount entry deadline is THIS FRIDAY, October 2nd.
Since 2022, we've received submissions from 70+ countries and we're excited to present another amazing collection of the best daddying stories submitted by students, Dads/dad figs, Moms, and indie filmmakers from around the world! Check the D3F website or our FilmFreeway page for submission details and to be inspired by Atticus Award-winning and finalist films from previous years!
SAVE THE DATES: The 6th annual, virtual Daddying Film Festival will take place on Eventive, January 11-20, 2027, and our LIVE Daddying Film Forum, at American University in Washington, DC, will screen select Atticus Award winners and finalists, January 29-30, 2027.
Adam Ukman is a father, husband, media executive, and the leader of The Dads Initiative. Drawing on a career spent building mission-driven programs and audience engagement strategies, Adam is passionate about redefining how fatherhood is represented in media. Adam believes that fatherhood can be one of the most transformative experiences in a man's life, and that Dads play a critical role in helping to create the world our kids deserve. He's motivated to find stories and drive narratives around how men show up everyday for themselves, their families, and their communities to build connections and stronger futures together.
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